Here Is A List Of The Ridiculous Things In The ‘Stimulus Bill’

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It took months, while Americans were suffering and wondering where help was going to come from, for lawmakers to work out the framework of the next stimulus bill.

Make no mistake, Republicans and Democrats played politics and let you suffer gambling on who you were going to blame for it.

But now that the bill is upon us, and after the government has told you that it cannot afford to give you retroactive unemployment and can only give you a $600 stimulus check, you should know what is in it.

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The bill calls for the creation of two new Smithsonian Museums on the National Mall, could give people caught illegally streaming as much as 10 years in prison, and declares it to be a “clear abuse” if any nation interferes with Tibet in selecting the next Dalai Lama.

Feel more secure yet? Wait, there is more.

It also forbids the United States Postal Service from delivering e-cigarettes and decriminalizes unauthorized use of Smokey The Bear.

No? Not more secure yet? Wait, this could help.

The bill gives $700 million to Sudan, $300 million to fisheries, and $10 million for “gender programs” in Pakistan.