OPINION: We, The Imperial, Pious and Pristine Florida Senate – We Hypocrites All

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Will black leaders stand together and condemn those in their community who use this word as vociferously as they condemn white or Hispanic people who use it?   That is what is necessary for this word’s use to stop.  That is exactly what we believe must be done to end its use forever.   

Until Black leaders stand united in opposition to anyone’s use of the “N” word, here is our proposal for handling the likes of Frank Artilles.  Let’s bring the Artilles crime before the full Senate and let him stand before a jury of his peers, fellow Senators, and be accused. Perhaps even try him in accordance with the Uniform Code of Military Justice – the same Code that applies to Marines. But before we begin the trial, we must first select a jury of Senators from a pool of 39 (38 in this Senate’s case). Let us allow the lawyers for Senator Artilles to ask a few qualifying questions of the behavior of the Senators before they can be seated as Jurors – all of which involves the integrity and character of the Florida Senate (which is the very point of this trial after all):    

  1. Have you ever had an extramarital affair, and have you ever had an affair with another Senator since being elected to the Senate and did that affair affect any of the Senate’s business?   
  2. Have you ever driven while intoxicated or smoked marijuana since you were elected to the Senate?
  3. Have you ever, since being elected to the Senate, used the “N” word, or the “P” word or any other mean, vulgar term in a private conversation with a peer or peers?
  4. Have you ever considered a contribution or contributor before making a vote or ever discussed a contribution in a state building?  

Those remaining who have answered “NO” to all of these questions may serve as the judges and jury for Frank Artilles and those without sin may cast the first stone.

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