The third root of fear is pain and loss. No matter how painful a situation is it will pass with time. Anyone who’s experienced significant loss knows this – it’s just hard to convince others that it’s true. It’s natural to act out with anger when you’re experiencing a loss, but in the end, it doesn’t help. This is another great time to just breathe and reflect instead.
Removing the Roots of Anger
The roots of anger are complicated. Any one of the emotions we’ve talked about above may cause them, or the problem could be a combination of all of them. The fruit of our anger tree can be very bitter and hard to swallow, but we have to if we want to move on. It might cause us to experience denial, self-destructive behaviour, to use inadequate coping mechanisms, we might distance ourselves from those closest to us, or we might choose to be controlling.
You have to identify what you’re really feeling. Get to the root cause. It’s the only way to overcome anger. Instead of wasting your energy on anger, use the situation as a growth and learning experience. Establish a healthy method for dealing with your emotions. Don’t run from them.
